Post Summer Update

I have abandoned by blog again, I must confessed. I suppose it's not too bad a crime since it just shows how busy I was the past few weeks.

Rewinding...

October had been a busy month indeed. To start off, my trip to India, a total eye opening trip which pretty much changed my perception of the world a little bit ... yea just a little :P. I won't say I will not go back, in fact, I hope the next time I do go back, I'll see a much better state of the country. The trip does make me realise why ppl like Gandhi and Mother Teresa exists. It's a completely different world out there. And I now have greater motivation to do more charity work :P ... yet to be one of my new year resolution !

Rest of the October? ...

Highlight was welcoming The BF home :) ...

Had a lovely welcoming back lunch at Artisan, The Westbury ...

Such an amazing deal due to London's Restaurant Week ... such a brilliant meal with N numbers of complimentary dishes.

Busy busy at work,

Had been doing weekend releases for the last 3 weeks including today... stayed in the office till 10pm for the first time, due to waiting for Chicago users to finish testing ... Got myself a mentor which I haven't been that good at keeping in touch with yet ... finally had a chance to try out the massive cafeteria at RC ... and of course, welcoming the grand new opening of One New Change, a mall a couple of mins walk from my office!!! More lunch time shopping! Wohoo! ... etc ...

Finally bought the iphone!!!

But haven't have much time to play with it yet due to work commitments ... how sad ... but enjoying the fact that I have now unlimited text on my tariff...

And I don't need to get the new nano :P ...

Other stuff ... had been going to quite a few of the stuff going on in London while it's still summer - Thames Festival, Design week - Tent London, Matsuri Festival and then ex-colleague's leaving due ... who is quitting to go travelling in the down under ... surprised how many had started leaving after I left ... felt strange to see my other ex-colleagues again ... just like the old days ... still couldn't have imagined how I stayed 4 years back in old Hatfield, LZ's visit in London again ...had a brief catch up during lunch near St. Pauls. Friend's birthday parties ... food overloaded, wedding invites which I have to politely decline invitation of although I would have very much loved to attend - sounds like it's a good wed month!, cooked rendang for The BF ... my second attempt on the dish ... I'm yet to perfect it!, made red bean and coconut milk agar - agar to a pot luck party ... etc etc ...

Got another hair cut and colour touch up yesterday ....

Next stop...MILAN! and of course, XMAS ! ... stay tuned ;)

9 years...90 days

Today mark the 9th year I have been in the UK. I arrived Heathrow 9 years ago today, filled with anxiety and uncertainty, just like a kitten about to be let loose into the world of independence - almost unwillingly because of a tinge of fear for being away from home.

Still remember vividly the smell of fresh yet chilly and foreign breath of air as I stepped out of the arrival hall. Now that I am sitting comfortably in my lovely Ikea eggy chair in my flat in London, recalling those very moments, I couldn't deny how much things have changed, personally and also everything else around me.

The news coverage airing on the hotel room TV couldn't have been more dramatic that day - and that definitely changed pretty much a lot of things in the world. As for me, I realised I've signed up for a never ending road trip...to independence and more uncertainties. But I am glad that the fear had subsided and these 9 precious years have definitely trained me well to be stronger me - or at least I would like to think that I have :).

The computer log on screen at work had been counting down the days for me too. Today is also the 90th day since I started my new job. It's just a wonder how amazing one can adapt to life.

The 30 minute walk to work that I thought could be dreadful has become somewhat a refreshing activity to wake me up every morning. The apprehension of being in a completely new and different environment has somewhat become all so familiar. The heavier work load (sometimes) and longer hours (only by a bit) are not as bad as it seems - the mocha from the tea point's coffee machine, lunch by the fountain in the square and okonomiyaki from wasabi almost manage to cheer me up most of the time.

It also feels so surreal yet to walk out of the office and realise I am actually surrounded by the majestic St Paul's cathedral and Victorian buildings blending in with the glassy contemporary office buildings. It feels uptown, if not pretentious. But it always never fails to remind myself that I've bagged another piece of valuable experience to my collection.

So hey, let's drive on...

Counselling oneself

The 8th of June 2010 me reminded me to live life as it is. How ironic the past me is the most effective counsellor...

I really hope I can convince myself to do better...

Re Mdm Yap's comment, thank you for the moral support! We'll fight this battle together and remember to just shout when you needed anything. I might be across the Atlantic, but the sound of friendship travels faster than any other things in the universe!

The dreading 3rd week of July

Last w/e spent productively in my continued mission to hunt down bargains for all so needed work clothes before the summer sales ends. Met up with LZ and her bro who was in London for the w/e and had dinner at Dehesa. Too bad we didn't have enough time to fit in a homey Msian meal as they wanted to.

Also allocated slots in my w/e s to VC with the BF. LD is definitely not new to me. But for some reason, I felt it being so much harder than my previous experience. Am I being more needy now? Has it got anything to do with aging maybe? LOL...or is it actually a good sign that I am feeling so? This month, admittedly, seems to be the longest month I've ever been in - firstly I am still waiting for this month's pay to feel I am in a better position financially - since I am still recovering from all the move etc, secondly, I am so looking fwd to Oct to come. Tbh, I don't think I am able to do LD anymore. I blame it on the age, or maybe bad experience :P.

This w/e was Ottolenghi brunch and Inception after with hsemate. Again, food lovers like us tend to make the same mistake of over ordering again and again and again. I had the Egg and Courgette bake which was really good! Packed the rest of the bread board that we couldn't have finish. But too bad we can't really bring the jar of yummy banana jam home :). During the movie, there was a few minutes of interruption. Initially we thought it was part of the show, but apparently it was a genuine fault of the cinema. After the show, they gave us a free voucher to claim a free ticket next time due to the inconvenience. Nice! The movie was quite good. A very interesting concept indeed! Aww now I want to design my own dreams!

Also went up to MK to collect and sort out mails for the BF. Wandered around MK Shopping centre for an hour or so before heading back to LDN. One exciting discovery though is that I found Kookai!!! I miss it so much now that they don't have any in LDN. That said, I didn't get anything - I need to clear out my cc bill first!

The week had been ok at work. Went to a couple of talks - pensions, technology community update and performance reviews etc. Only visited the gym twice this week. Aiming to do 3 next week :). Had lunch with a bunch of other new joiners on Wed and a another bunch of summer interns on Thurs. I guess that is the advantage of working in a bigger company, more events, more people, more opportunities to do different things - instead of sitting in front of the screen programming 8 hours a day. I have more thoughts than this, but I don't think I should go into details - the only thing I would like to remind myself is that, I've come too far to slack off - it's time to continue climbing the ever so high fleet of stairs after a good rest. A good cup of 'yin yeung' is what I need to keep on pushing!

Last post, I mentioned I have been thinking a lot of what I am actually doing with my life now. It's surprising how many other ppl I've talked to are feeling the same. I know at least I am not alone. But I do wish these dear friends of mine will find their 'direction' of life some day soon. If there is a meteor to visit this part of the earth tonight, I will wish for that one day when everything just fits and fall into place nicely...

*The 'fertitily' tarot card says I should be patient. I guess it's a good enough piece of advice to stay happy. Pressure from external forces can be suffocating some times. But from an optimist's point of view, these forces do inject a reasonable amount of motivation and project positive energy to a certain degree.

A random peek into my life...

W/e spent with a lovely brunch @ the Breakfast Club in Hoxton with couz and frens, a random stroll around spitalfields mrkt, a discovery of Thai Ann oriental supermarket right off Chapel Market, and of course, the World Cup finals...I am enjoying the trips down to Chapel Market to pick up some cheap and fresh produce...Wonder when I will get bored on London...

4 working weeks down, and the challenges of work is significantly increasing. How I wish I will wake up one day knowing everything about the financial markets! I heard a lot of ppl telling me it will just click one day. I am still eagerly anticipating that one day to come ... asap!

It's that day in life where I have time to ponder about life again. Some times I still wonder what I am doing with my life.

It's that feeling that you've longing to buy that all so expensive pair of heels displayed on the window of that vintage boutique shop. And then you finally saved enough to bring it home, wore it the first time for that special night, and neatly place it back into the wooden chest shoe box that comes with it... then what's next...This is how I felt July 2010, after everything that has had happened the first half of the year. Classic...it's the classic feeling of desire and "disinclination"...

Work and weekends,

Can life be more meaningful that this?

Family so distant, friendship so fragile,

Is that sign of growing up and taking responsibility for oneself?

Wedding invites, baby showers,

Am I just being the tortoise in the race with the hare?

Wishes under the meteor that came true,

Are they a blessing or otherwise?

...now back to short selling and ex dividend dates...

June 2010

Almost a month since I've moved in my new place now. I can say I think I have now filled in all the 'incompleteness' of my room today after a brief second trip to Ikea :). I finally got the chair I always wanted!!! :)))

3rd week into my new job ... everything's ok so far I'd say. Quite proud of myself to be so motivated to walk to work everyday. Had been trying out different routes to beat my 27 minutes, but with no avail so far. On the bright side, I am also starting to explore the area a lil more. For e.g, Necco Jap Cafe discovery made my Friday evening! I do enjoy the convenience of the city and the benefits working in such an established organisation - all the training and subsidised incentives! But of course, it's not without any hard work - all that I am looking fwd too (yea right :P)

A week to the BF not around. Time just seem to pass so slowly... October seems so far away :(. All of a sudden I felt all so lonely again (some times) - you can so tell when I have time to update my blog :P

All in all June 2010 were filled with QT with the BF, celebrating birthdays, BBQ, watching footie, summer sales shopping, soaking in the sunshine, although not quite enjoying the heat that much, trying to settle in life working in the city and wearing skirts to work of course :P

Mid 2010

Birthday + Bank holiday weekend was spent at the Foodies Festival at Hampton Court on Sat in which the main highlight was meeting Jason Atherton and having him signed his new book for me!!! The weather was unwelcoming, the festival wasn't as happening as I expected, but meeting Jason Atherton just made my day. Got back to London later in the afternoon and met up with Holly for dinner at Sushi Hiroba - had the weirdest sushi ever in my life - the place certainly has a very interesting sushi line up, ranging from sushi with banana to fried ones.

Started the Sunday with a girlie salon trip and lunch at Le Pain. Thanks Holly for the lunch treat :). Shopped for a bit before meeting up with the BF and had bubble tea at China town (well I had red bean ice to be exact :P). Having some spare time before dinner, we manage to fit SATC 2 into our afternoon - unexpectedly. It was quite a decent movie, I have no complains. But watching it with a girlfriend and a boyfriend is just not the most ideal cinema trip, enough said :P. Birthday dinner was at Eastside Inn. Wanted to try this new place out for a long time and it didn't dissapoint - highly recommended!!!!

The following week was my last week at work. Didn't have much to do but had quite sinful meals- fish and chips take away at a colleague's place on Thurs, Lahore Kebab House dinner with new colleagues and Red Lion on Friday. Got a 10 inch digital photo frame and a couple of John Lewis vouchers as my leaving gift. Such thoughtful colleagues :P. The weekend was then spent moving things into my new flat. I was quite impressed with myself having to finish unpacking in a day! Went back to Hatfield to clean up my room etc today and am quite tired myself after all the packing, moving and unpacking. A full day spa will be a real treat for me now!

Tonight is the 3rd night in my new flat. Everything's quite ok. The little little things I would complain about but think I shouldn't are - well first thing on top of the list is the traffic noise from outside. My room is facing the main road and it can be quite noisy especially those sierens! Can Londoners be a bit considerate and try to reduce the frequency of being drunk and beaten up less often? :P. Other small little things are like if only the toilet flush has higher pressure and if only the carpets are a lot more cleaner. Well, I do understand its not new. Anyways, everything seems ok for the time being. I just need to get some curtains and more textiles / cushions to absorb the noise! Any other advice welcomed!

Although London isn't new to me, to be actually living in the city is definitely something I need to adapt to. A country girl like me still kind of prefer the quiet and peaceful little towns like Hatfield :P.

Some Nico's philosophy after this couple of weeks:...

There has been so much things happening around me the past two weeks, and I suppose more to come in the following weeks, and there are occassions where I feel I've lost myself for a bit. I thought I have a clear direction on what I want to achieve. But there seems to be other external forces that are distracting me, be it good or bad. The devil in me is not helping either. I also realised how hard it is to please everyone around you especially when they don't see the situation as a whole as you do. I found myself being nagged on things lately, small little things in life by my closed ones. But what they don't understand is that although they are part of my world, they don't see it how I see it. Sometimes they just have to know that I am old enough to make my own judgements on what I should or should not be doing. I do need advice from time to time, but when I am not asking for it, I am quite definite it's a right thing for me.

Things to remind myself:

Life's too short to worry about the missing jigsaw pieces or the pieces that just don't fit. Friends who are impartial to your life can say whatevever they want whether it is sincerely from the bottom of their heart or vice versa. At the end of the day, the decision is yours. Decide and never regret! Take things lightly Nico! Live life as it is and enjoy the moment!