Post Summer Update

I have abandoned by blog again, I must confessed. I suppose it's not too bad a crime since it just shows how busy I was the past few weeks.

Rewinding...

October had been a busy month indeed. To start off, my trip to India, a total eye opening trip which pretty much changed my perception of the world a little bit ... yea just a little :P. I won't say I will not go back, in fact, I hope the next time I do go back, I'll see a much better state of the country. The trip does make me realise why ppl like Gandhi and Mother Teresa exists. It's a completely different world out there. And I now have greater motivation to do more charity work :P ... yet to be one of my new year resolution !

Rest of the October? ...

Highlight was welcoming The BF home :) ...

Had a lovely welcoming back lunch at Artisan, The Westbury ...

Such an amazing deal due to London's Restaurant Week ... such a brilliant meal with N numbers of complimentary dishes.

Busy busy at work,

Had been doing weekend releases for the last 3 weeks including today... stayed in the office till 10pm for the first time, due to waiting for Chicago users to finish testing ... Got myself a mentor which I haven't been that good at keeping in touch with yet ... finally had a chance to try out the massive cafeteria at RC ... and of course, welcoming the grand new opening of One New Change, a mall a couple of mins walk from my office!!! More lunch time shopping! Wohoo! ... etc ...

Finally bought the iphone!!!

But haven't have much time to play with it yet due to work commitments ... how sad ... but enjoying the fact that I have now unlimited text on my tariff...

And I don't need to get the new nano :P ...

Other stuff ... had been going to quite a few of the stuff going on in London while it's still summer - Thames Festival, Design week - Tent London, Matsuri Festival and then ex-colleague's leaving due ... who is quitting to go travelling in the down under ... surprised how many had started leaving after I left ... felt strange to see my other ex-colleagues again ... just like the old days ... still couldn't have imagined how I stayed 4 years back in old Hatfield, LZ's visit in London again ...had a brief catch up during lunch near St. Pauls. Friend's birthday parties ... food overloaded, wedding invites which I have to politely decline invitation of although I would have very much loved to attend - sounds like it's a good wed month!, cooked rendang for The BF ... my second attempt on the dish ... I'm yet to perfect it!, made red bean and coconut milk agar - agar to a pot luck party ... etc etc ...

Got another hair cut and colour touch up yesterday ....

Next stop...MILAN! and of course, XMAS ! ... stay tuned ;)

9 years...90 days

Today mark the 9th year I have been in the UK. I arrived Heathrow 9 years ago today, filled with anxiety and uncertainty, just like a kitten about to be let loose into the world of independence - almost unwillingly because of a tinge of fear for being away from home.

Still remember vividly the smell of fresh yet chilly and foreign breath of air as I stepped out of the arrival hall. Now that I am sitting comfortably in my lovely Ikea eggy chair in my flat in London, recalling those very moments, I couldn't deny how much things have changed, personally and also everything else around me.

The news coverage airing on the hotel room TV couldn't have been more dramatic that day - and that definitely changed pretty much a lot of things in the world. As for me, I realised I've signed up for a never ending road trip...to independence and more uncertainties. But I am glad that the fear had subsided and these 9 precious years have definitely trained me well to be stronger me - or at least I would like to think that I have :).

The computer log on screen at work had been counting down the days for me too. Today is also the 90th day since I started my new job. It's just a wonder how amazing one can adapt to life.

The 30 minute walk to work that I thought could be dreadful has become somewhat a refreshing activity to wake me up every morning. The apprehension of being in a completely new and different environment has somewhat become all so familiar. The heavier work load (sometimes) and longer hours (only by a bit) are not as bad as it seems - the mocha from the tea point's coffee machine, lunch by the fountain in the square and okonomiyaki from wasabi almost manage to cheer me up most of the time.

It also feels so surreal yet to walk out of the office and realise I am actually surrounded by the majestic St Paul's cathedral and Victorian buildings blending in with the glassy contemporary office buildings. It feels uptown, if not pretentious. But it always never fails to remind myself that I've bagged another piece of valuable experience to my collection.

So hey, let's drive on...

Counselling oneself

The 8th of June 2010 me reminded me to live life as it is. How ironic the past me is the most effective counsellor...

I really hope I can convince myself to do better...

Re Mdm Yap's comment, thank you for the moral support! We'll fight this battle together and remember to just shout when you needed anything. I might be across the Atlantic, but the sound of friendship travels faster than any other things in the universe!

The dreading 3rd week of July

Last w/e spent productively in my continued mission to hunt down bargains for all so needed work clothes before the summer sales ends. Met up with LZ and her bro who was in London for the w/e and had dinner at Dehesa. Too bad we didn't have enough time to fit in a homey Msian meal as they wanted to.

Also allocated slots in my w/e s to VC with the BF. LD is definitely not new to me. But for some reason, I felt it being so much harder than my previous experience. Am I being more needy now? Has it got anything to do with aging maybe? LOL...or is it actually a good sign that I am feeling so? This month, admittedly, seems to be the longest month I've ever been in - firstly I am still waiting for this month's pay to feel I am in a better position financially - since I am still recovering from all the move etc, secondly, I am so looking fwd to Oct to come. Tbh, I don't think I am able to do LD anymore. I blame it on the age, or maybe bad experience :P.

This w/e was Ottolenghi brunch and Inception after with hsemate. Again, food lovers like us tend to make the same mistake of over ordering again and again and again. I had the Egg and Courgette bake which was really good! Packed the rest of the bread board that we couldn't have finish. But too bad we can't really bring the jar of yummy banana jam home :). During the movie, there was a few minutes of interruption. Initially we thought it was part of the show, but apparently it was a genuine fault of the cinema. After the show, they gave us a free voucher to claim a free ticket next time due to the inconvenience. Nice! The movie was quite good. A very interesting concept indeed! Aww now I want to design my own dreams!

Also went up to MK to collect and sort out mails for the BF. Wandered around MK Shopping centre for an hour or so before heading back to LDN. One exciting discovery though is that I found Kookai!!! I miss it so much now that they don't have any in LDN. That said, I didn't get anything - I need to clear out my cc bill first!

The week had been ok at work. Went to a couple of talks - pensions, technology community update and performance reviews etc. Only visited the gym twice this week. Aiming to do 3 next week :). Had lunch with a bunch of other new joiners on Wed and a another bunch of summer interns on Thurs. I guess that is the advantage of working in a bigger company, more events, more people, more opportunities to do different things - instead of sitting in front of the screen programming 8 hours a day. I have more thoughts than this, but I don't think I should go into details - the only thing I would like to remind myself is that, I've come too far to slack off - it's time to continue climbing the ever so high fleet of stairs after a good rest. A good cup of 'yin yeung' is what I need to keep on pushing!

Last post, I mentioned I have been thinking a lot of what I am actually doing with my life now. It's surprising how many other ppl I've talked to are feeling the same. I know at least I am not alone. But I do wish these dear friends of mine will find their 'direction' of life some day soon. If there is a meteor to visit this part of the earth tonight, I will wish for that one day when everything just fits and fall into place nicely...

*The 'fertitily' tarot card says I should be patient. I guess it's a good enough piece of advice to stay happy. Pressure from external forces can be suffocating some times. But from an optimist's point of view, these forces do inject a reasonable amount of motivation and project positive energy to a certain degree.

A random peek into my life...

W/e spent with a lovely brunch @ the Breakfast Club in Hoxton with couz and frens, a random stroll around spitalfields mrkt, a discovery of Thai Ann oriental supermarket right off Chapel Market, and of course, the World Cup finals...I am enjoying the trips down to Chapel Market to pick up some cheap and fresh produce...Wonder when I will get bored on London...

4 working weeks down, and the challenges of work is significantly increasing. How I wish I will wake up one day knowing everything about the financial markets! I heard a lot of ppl telling me it will just click one day. I am still eagerly anticipating that one day to come ... asap!

It's that day in life where I have time to ponder about life again. Some times I still wonder what I am doing with my life.

It's that feeling that you've longing to buy that all so expensive pair of heels displayed on the window of that vintage boutique shop. And then you finally saved enough to bring it home, wore it the first time for that special night, and neatly place it back into the wooden chest shoe box that comes with it... then what's next...This is how I felt July 2010, after everything that has had happened the first half of the year. Classic...it's the classic feeling of desire and "disinclination"...

Work and weekends,

Can life be more meaningful that this?

Family so distant, friendship so fragile,

Is that sign of growing up and taking responsibility for oneself?

Wedding invites, baby showers,

Am I just being the tortoise in the race with the hare?

Wishes under the meteor that came true,

Are they a blessing or otherwise?

...now back to short selling and ex dividend dates...

June 2010

Almost a month since I've moved in my new place now. I can say I think I have now filled in all the 'incompleteness' of my room today after a brief second trip to Ikea :). I finally got the chair I always wanted!!! :)))

3rd week into my new job ... everything's ok so far I'd say. Quite proud of myself to be so motivated to walk to work everyday. Had been trying out different routes to beat my 27 minutes, but with no avail so far. On the bright side, I am also starting to explore the area a lil more. For e.g, Necco Jap Cafe discovery made my Friday evening! I do enjoy the convenience of the city and the benefits working in such an established organisation - all the training and subsidised incentives! But of course, it's not without any hard work - all that I am looking fwd too (yea right :P)

A week to the BF not around. Time just seem to pass so slowly... October seems so far away :(. All of a sudden I felt all so lonely again (some times) - you can so tell when I have time to update my blog :P

All in all June 2010 were filled with QT with the BF, celebrating birthdays, BBQ, watching footie, summer sales shopping, soaking in the sunshine, although not quite enjoying the heat that much, trying to settle in life working in the city and wearing skirts to work of course :P

Mid 2010

Birthday + Bank holiday weekend was spent at the Foodies Festival at Hampton Court on Sat in which the main highlight was meeting Jason Atherton and having him signed his new book for me!!! The weather was unwelcoming, the festival wasn't as happening as I expected, but meeting Jason Atherton just made my day. Got back to London later in the afternoon and met up with Holly for dinner at Sushi Hiroba - had the weirdest sushi ever in my life - the place certainly has a very interesting sushi line up, ranging from sushi with banana to fried ones.

Started the Sunday with a girlie salon trip and lunch at Le Pain. Thanks Holly for the lunch treat :). Shopped for a bit before meeting up with the BF and had bubble tea at China town (well I had red bean ice to be exact :P). Having some spare time before dinner, we manage to fit SATC 2 into our afternoon - unexpectedly. It was quite a decent movie, I have no complains. But watching it with a girlfriend and a boyfriend is just not the most ideal cinema trip, enough said :P. Birthday dinner was at Eastside Inn. Wanted to try this new place out for a long time and it didn't dissapoint - highly recommended!!!!

The following week was my last week at work. Didn't have much to do but had quite sinful meals- fish and chips take away at a colleague's place on Thurs, Lahore Kebab House dinner with new colleagues and Red Lion on Friday. Got a 10 inch digital photo frame and a couple of John Lewis vouchers as my leaving gift. Such thoughtful colleagues :P. The weekend was then spent moving things into my new flat. I was quite impressed with myself having to finish unpacking in a day! Went back to Hatfield to clean up my room etc today and am quite tired myself after all the packing, moving and unpacking. A full day spa will be a real treat for me now!

Tonight is the 3rd night in my new flat. Everything's quite ok. The little little things I would complain about but think I shouldn't are - well first thing on top of the list is the traffic noise from outside. My room is facing the main road and it can be quite noisy especially those sierens! Can Londoners be a bit considerate and try to reduce the frequency of being drunk and beaten up less often? :P. Other small little things are like if only the toilet flush has higher pressure and if only the carpets are a lot more cleaner. Well, I do understand its not new. Anyways, everything seems ok for the time being. I just need to get some curtains and more textiles / cushions to absorb the noise! Any other advice welcomed!

Although London isn't new to me, to be actually living in the city is definitely something I need to adapt to. A country girl like me still kind of prefer the quiet and peaceful little towns like Hatfield :P.

Some Nico's philosophy after this couple of weeks:...

There has been so much things happening around me the past two weeks, and I suppose more to come in the following weeks, and there are occassions where I feel I've lost myself for a bit. I thought I have a clear direction on what I want to achieve. But there seems to be other external forces that are distracting me, be it good or bad. The devil in me is not helping either. I also realised how hard it is to please everyone around you especially when they don't see the situation as a whole as you do. I found myself being nagged on things lately, small little things in life by my closed ones. But what they don't understand is that although they are part of my world, they don't see it how I see it. Sometimes they just have to know that I am old enough to make my own judgements on what I should or should not be doing. I do need advice from time to time, but when I am not asking for it, I am quite definite it's a right thing for me.

Things to remind myself:

Life's too short to worry about the missing jigsaw pieces or the pieces that just don't fit. Friends who are impartial to your life can say whatevever they want whether it is sincerely from the bottom of their heart or vice versa. At the end of the day, the decision is yours. Decide and never regret! Take things lightly Nico! Live life as it is and enjoy the moment!

Turning 28

At 28 I learnt that this is a fair life I am living in, when you gain something, you lost something along the way. Things happen when you least expected it. At the same time, what you wish for might not be the best for you after all...

Another Piece of Nico's Philosophy

I have not been updating my blog that frequently this month. I suppose it's a good thing as well because that means I am actually busy occupied by other things that are happening around me.

...*rewind to where I left my blog*...

Finally got my Tier 1 visa approved and got my passport back around the 10th. It was the Monday that I had to bring myself to say I am quitting my current job. It's not easy, but it wasn't hard as I thought it would be either :).

Met up with CM and JJ for dinner @ Hereford Road, Bayswater after work on Wed. Their menu were very adventurous indeed. The pigeon I had for mains is ok. And also tried a lil bit of JJ's calf's brain. It was not that bad, just tasted deep fried jelly :P. But need to thank JJ for the dinner since its on his treat for my BD :)

Spent the following weekend with the BF after the whole 3 weeks not seeing him and missing him dearly...had dim sum lunch, ice cream @ patisserie valerie, Iron Man 2 and then Thai for dinner - another w/e norm for me these days. Not for long any more though...

Weekdays were spent productively sorting out my room, clearing out 4 years worth of clutter. Felt a bit 'ng seh tak' to part with most "junk" that have been with me since I came to the UK - 9 years! But it needs be done. Most of the old clothes, shoes and bags are now in the clothes bank. That said, I am no where ready to move! Only managed to throw away a lot of stuff and got some empty boxes from the shops in the Galleria.

Last weekend was a very good w/e. Never had such a special weekend for a long time :))). Took a day off on Friday and spent the first half of the day with the BF and then started our road trip - direction - North East towards Norwich. Stayed at his friend's house who is living there with his wife. Such a nice couple and really appreciate them for accommodating us. It is a very quiet area - totally out of the city - can you imagine living somewhere without phone reception? And the only thing around you is lovely big green fields, inviting and chilling al fresco english pubs and friendly, polite people who are actually generous enough to return your smile :). Got there around 6ish and then headed out to a local pub for dinner. I had a fish platter which is not bad. The BF's lamb shoulder is soooooo much nicer.

Spent the next day boating for a good couple of hours at the Norfolk Broads. I think we were at Horning...Lovely weather, driving a boat (although a small one), dodging ducks, a pint of beer, a couple of pretty shots and a homey BBQ after made my day :). The weather is super kind to us. The hottest weekend ever so far this year! It is also a big factor to how pretty my photos turn out to be :). I'd say the best meal have to be the Sunday lunch at the Birds in Hand pub. The crab I ordered were super yummy :))) and of course the bailey's cheesecake! All in all a w/e well spent, enjoyed the laughs at breakfast, the company and most of all the surprise from my dearest :). How can Nico ask for more :)))...Photos in my picasa album :)

It's 3 days to Nico turning a year older. I'd say I have been holding on to the 2010 luck quite well so far. The BF said when something is meant to be, they will just fit into your life. I guess it's quite true. When things are meant to happen, they just do. Plus, so far, there are a lot of changes in my life the first half of the year but at the same time these things trickle through slowly and I suppose it's a good thing as I also get the time to adapt to them. Although I am not looking forward to turning 28, I don't see why I should be depressed or complain about it either.

...now...need to move my ass and start packing again....what a dreadful task!

2nd May w/e - A Step Forward

The weekend weather is a bit unfriendly. Anyhow, went to meet JL for lunch near his service apartment, just in time to say goodbye to him before he flies back to sunny SG. Had a chicken burger and oreo's milkshake at Byron, Glouster Road. I still thinks it is a bit overrated by food bloggers. To do Fine Burger Co. justice that is. Dropped by Real Food Festival at Earl's Court. There were quite a lot of stalls set up. Some brands I've not even heard before. Products range from chocolates, wine, cheese, sausages, spices, sauces, beverages etc etc. I've only bought two packs of Teapigs tea - a chocolate flake tea and a jasmine pearl! Am tempted to buy the matcha too but thought it's a bit over priced at £20 for a small bottle. I wonder if it is that effective since it claims to detox and help weight loss! Wonder how is it different from normal Japanese matcha too. Hmm.

Had a pretty chilled out Sunday too although I woke up super early like 7am! Lingered a bit before heading for the gym to burn off yesterday's lunch and food tasting at the festival. Met up with CM to check out the Puppet festival at Covent. Watched Punch and Judy for a bit. Felt a bit out of place since most of the people there went with their kids and stuff. After a Le Pain moccacino, I headed home and started pondering...

I am already feeling the Monday Blues creeping in. In fact, am mentally preparing myself for the next step ahead. The hurdle that I've been anticipating for a while, one of the biggest yet.

I realised how 'emo' I have been the past few weeks. I am still trying to justify whether it is healthy being 'emo' occasionally. Some people think it's bad because it may lead to all sorts of psychological problems like mental break downs and depressio?!. But I suppose a small dose of 'emo'ness doesn't do much harm? And also, I do believe that 'emo'ness is one of the source of inspiration to most writers' and artists' works ;).

Anyhow, the ups and downs of my emotions is having an effect on me. I am losing grip on injecting positive energy to myself and those around me. Someone once said ... "It's not all about me"...I do admit that I tend lose myself sometimes. I have people whom I care about that I neglected. Time to bin those uninviting negative feelings! And also, time to stop being frustrated of whatever happens. "Take responsibility" as Susan Jeffers says, and reclaim my power!!!

Where Is Everyone?

There has been a lot going on the past week or so. The traffic lights has suddenly turned green. And I have to proceed. An undecisive Nico suddenly have to make loads of decisions for herself. I know those who care about me are with me on the whole transition, it's not fair to say this, but it just felt like I am all alone on the case all of a sudden cos everyone's so far away. Well, I guess there are just decisions that I have to make myself. Why is Nico suddenly became so dependent? Where is the all-so independent her that others use to be surprised about? A sign to pick myself up, crawl out of the cocoon and face the ugly world! The responsibilities of being a grown up is never to be undermined!

I suppose I am concerned because I care about what others think of my decisions as well. Oh well, another lesson to learn - be confident of your choices. No matter what happens, I promise myself to embrace it. I believe luck is on my side. Be brave!

Keep on believing! ... these are just what I need:

The same song by 3 artists in 3 languagues respectively.

• Letter - Angela Aki
• 劉若英 - 給十五歲的自己
• 鍾舒漫-給自己的信

Opposite Attracts?

And so they say...opposite attracts...

I can't believe I googled for "opposite attracts" and ended up reading an article on dating tips...

Quotes:

Stubbornness in a relationship where opposites attract will bring about disastrous results. Being open and open-minded, with a strong ability from both people to compromise, can create an environment of security and contentment amongst opposites.

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

1) Can you live with the differences or would you rather share your time with someone who likes and wants similar things that you do?

2) What is the foundation of your relationship based on?

3) Does being opposite create conflicts in your relationship?

4) What is it about the differences that you find exciting and stimulating?

5) Are you both great communicators with the ability to compromise?

6) Do you find that being opposites help compliment the relationship versus bringing conflict?

Being opposites can work if they are complimentary to the relationship and both people are open-minded with the ability to compromise when needed. Not having those abilities could create potential conflict leading to a bitter breakup. You need to analyze which category your relationship falls into. Good luck

All the luck I need indeed!?

Easter 2010

It was a chilling long weekend for Nico's 2010 Easter break. Friday morning was occupied by Easter treat baking for the BF. Only the chocolate mini muffins made it. The normal mango vanilla ones failed miserably. I knew it was a bad idea but didn't realise it turned out that bad because the centre doesn't seem to cook properly due to the mango puree. Anyway, luckily the chocolate ones turned out reasonably well.

Had dim sum for lunch later the day and watched Clash of Titans in 3D. It was a so-so movie. Not too great, maybe because we kind of expected too much before the movie. Even Sam Worthington's performance was not as good as he was in Avatar. He had very limited dialogue, and again, maybe he just need to look good in his spartan suit, showing off his muscles.

Got down to Wembley on Saturday just to check out the new Pacific Plaza which is suppose to be something like the closed down Oriental City. Only the food court and some shops were open. The oriental supermarket is not open yet. We tried some malaysian food at the food court. The curry laksa and the mamak mee goreng were quite decent. But the satay was not authentic enough. There were quite a variety of asian food stalls - korean, japanese, chinese dim sum and roast mixes etc. I'd say the food there is ok but not a place you will go specifically if you need an oriental meal fix. There are better restaurants in central london. The most interesting shop would be the Japanese bakery - Tetote factory - bought a melon bun, a fig and orange bun and a brioche to try - but missed the adzuki buns cos they were sold out.

Another lazy Sunday was spent "productively" in Bolnhurst with a yummy Sunday roast lunch at The Plough. Now that I am actually blogging about this place that I found out it's actually run by Martin Lee (he's one of Raymond Blanc's trained chef). A very cosy and lovely pub indeed with posh patrons and of course - high quality british food - especially the delicious rhubarb crumble!!! :)). What could be more heavenly than beautifully presented food sourced from fresh local produce and a meal with complimentary warm home made bread! Plus, it was a nice drive at the country side with only blue skies, green fields and cute cottages in sight - out of all the polution and crowd of the city.

So how is life treating Nico so far?...It felt like Nico's been abducted to lala land this easter weekend. There is quite a lot things floating around my mind to ponder about. But suddenly it just felt that no matter how much I think about them, it is not going to change much of reality. Thus, Nico's decided that there is no point thinking so much, and to fully enjoy every moment of happiness, bravely embrace every pinch of misery. It's only a few more hours to go before Nico has to face reality again. Time to wake up!

April Fools Day Ponder

I wonder sometimes what am I doing to my life right now...

Can life be more pointless than this?

There are some things that doesn't feel right at the moment

I don't know what it is or what they are...

How many times do I need to tell myself tomorrow will be a better day

How many times do I need to remind myself I need to be brave

How many times do I need recall the promises I made to myself to focus...

...too many times...

Nearly end of March Update

Last w/e...

Met up with JL for lunch at Ten Ten Tei. It's been a while since I last saw him! So jealous that he gets to go back home again for 2 weeks. If only I have a job that involves more travelling, that'll be fun!

Then wandered around Regent St and Selfridges with Kev before having dinner at Viet Grill near Old Street. Really good Vietnamese food!!! And good ambience too!!! Highly recommended!!! These are what we ordered:

• Các món rang mu i (Chilli salt and pepper squid) - the first few pieces were a bit too salty for me but it's good - A*
• Canh c i n u tôm Seasonal bok choy greens in fragrant broth tofu - really yummy broth!!! A*
• Cà tím n ng ‘Piggy Grilled Aubergine’ with scallion pork in tangy sweet and sour sauce - really like the sauce, light and appetising! - A**
• Sake Lamb skewer BBQ cubed leg of lamb, with cumin and fennel, flavoured up with a touch of vietnamese sake - still good but the rest are better - A :)

We also ordered plain noodles with bean-sprouts and onion and surprisingly it's not plain at all! It's like a proper fried noodle dish itself!!! Satisfying Vietnamese meal :)

Went to YF's house warming party afterwards. Was only drinking and chatting...quite relaxing...I'd say they did a good job furnishing the place...plus the 37 inch TV is brilliant!

Come Monday, I was dreading myself to work. But it turns out the day wasn't that bad after all. Manage to deploy some fixes and do some proper work without being hassled by users.

p.s...The current chapter of Nico's life is about to end and a new one yet to begin...stay tuned...

And I Survived

Note: the following is one of Nico's rants again and is definitely beyond human comprehension...so just ignore...

Totally unbelievable that I survived the week! It had been an extremely busy week. When is this going to end?!?!?...Hopefully soon!!!...I'm getting impatient waiting...and it's only past one week >< ...!!!

At this moment, it seems like I am holding on to all these things...One day, I promise myself, if all these ever fell off my hands, I'll let everything go, take up a photography course and travel this world till I've used up every penny I saved up all these years...

Not So Happy Day...

...bad day! bad day! ... I seriously think the devil is playing a prank on me >< ...

Being Happy

So what makes you happy?

...a meteor across the pitch black sky?

...a rainbow after a wet rainy day?

...a light and fluffy macaron?

...a freshly baked, just out of the oven egg tart?

...a surprise post in the mail box?

I have always doubt the phrase "...as long as you are happy..." used in a lot of advices people give you no matter whether you are trying to make a decision or what not. Doubt because I never knew what makes me happier and for the fact that for the past year or so life has been as it was until now. I think I can finally admit to myself that at this very moment, I am happy. No matter how bad a day I had to go through at work or what not, there seem to be a great force pulling me back together. I thought I am just on lala-land mode (as I normally do)...but everything seems so surreal...there is no switch...it's all happening for real! Of course I wish the feeling will continue... but even if it ever fades, at least I know I felt this way before...It's very strange...to an extent that my logical mind can't seem to explain why I felt that way...maybe that's called love x))...

p.s Life is hard...but the positive energy you inject into your life and others are the greatest motivation and help of all...

Last w/e

As the strange things continue to invade my life this new 2010, another unbelievable thing happened last w/e...we missed our train to Liverpool! Devastated, and unable to accept the fact that we actually missed the train not because we were late but because we hopped onto the wrong train a little too early, we decided to cancel the trip and went for a drink at St. Pancras Grand...

Spent the rest of the w/e chilling out at home and in London...went to YF's new place and hang around helping them move, although I didn't do much :P. Had dinner at the Circus, Covent Garden. Good food and there are actually performances in between meals! Highly recommended!

Went shopping in Brent Cross yesterday and quite a lot of damage done to my bank acct ><, but hey it's the new Spring Summer collection, how can I ever resists since I'm a Spring girl!!! Oh well, I'll try to control myself better hehe :)

...I know I told myself to be brave this year...but, suddenly there is a strong feeling of fear in me, fear of going back to square one...

...as much as I can be rational enough to counsel others...I am hopeless at counselling myself...I guess that is why you need your closest friends and family to do it for you...

2nd w/e of CNY

Monday morning surprise.....heavy snow in Hatfield...

Spent the past few days at work going through spreadsheets for a data collecting task...TBH, I've never used that much Excel in my life! Tedious as it is, at least I brushed up my Excel skills...

The first week of CNY in London is as dull as work goes. I have to keep reminding myself it's still the CNY cause it just doesn't feel like it. How I wish I am back home celebrating. Life...the way I chose it...is the way I should live it. I should stop complaining. But hey, I just said I wished :P...

Anyway...w/e spent quite productively I'd say. Watched Valentine's day and All's Well End's Well at Prince Charles cinema - as mou liu as expected, Louis Koo is surprisingly good in the movie and it's just the sort of movie I need to watch, just to get away from "reality". Coincidently the CNY parade is held on Sunday as well. Managed to make my way through the crowds in China Town - just not a day you wanna be in town. London crowd is fatal!

Look what I found in Japan Centre! Taiyaki!!! 4 quid for a pack of 2 - not the cheapest thing on earth - but it's London after all...

Valentine's day is a so-so movie...not great, but has its good moments. Personally I think there are too many casts - too many stories - too cramped. And it definitely does not have a fairy tale ending - which is good - at least you don't feel cheated :P. I like the reality in it. There is a scene where Ashton Kutcher tried kissing his best friend Jennifer Garner to see if they have feelings for each other, after both of them broke up with their other half. Coincidently one of my best buddy told me yesterday night that it is something that really works - tried and tested apparently. Well, its a scene you usually see on screens - but I've always thought it only happens in movies - Amy, I'll take your word for it :P. And just realised Eric Dane is equivalent to Heath Ledger + Leonardo Di Carpio - what a discovery! :P...Comparing to 500 days of summer ( which is almost the last romantic drama I watched ), 500 days definitely have more story to it, although a bit sad and a little too realistic.

So many romantic films out since it's the Valentine's month, but there is still nothing that is remotely as good as "10 things I hate about you" and "Love Actually"...oh and "Needing You" too :).

p.s "...Love, I ask, What are you made of, You are too mysterious and most of the time, too complicated for my simple mind to comprehend..."

Pancake Day

It's pancake day and also third day of CNY...

How's your celebrations so far?

Made these impromptu:

Mood on Shrove's Tuesday: Nico suddenly felt so much grown up now, it takes experience and maturity to realise the reality of life and be able to think rationally. Defensive Nico is still very well aware of the existence of the angel and devil who have the same ability to bring a smile to Nico's face. Still remember, pancake day last year, Nico was at a very emotional state. A year today, Nico thinks she is lucky to have survived and learnt from it.

Quote of the day : 'It's been a while since I have this kind of feeling...'

It's a good day, it's the first day of CNY, I know I shouldn't be ranting, but....A Sunday, a Chinese New Year day, a Valentines day - this just shows you can't fit too much in one day! Especially when those components just doesn't tally together! Anyway, hope you lot manage to pull everything together and hope your day goes smoothly.

I must say, a whole lot of strange and unexpected things happened since the past weeks or so and still continuing...I can only comment that sometimes, you just have to believe the power of fate and destiny - never undermine them. I am not complaining, in fact hope more of it is coming...

Anyway, Nico wishes you lot a very Happy Chinese New Year ! May you have a prosperous and eventful year ahead! Hope this is another brilliant and memorable year for you - in a good way. Don't hesitate, don't waste time on the past, move on, just let it go, leave all your worries behind, tomorrow is a bright new start, trust me, everything will be fine! Love the tiger, and it will love you back :).

Nico need to focus now!!!

3 days to CNY and Valentines

Apparently it is very rare that CNY falls on the same day as Valentines. For me it's just another Sunday. Of course, there are very much a reason to celebrate, but I managed to get myself really really, I mean super duper busy these few weeks. Everything from work to life! Is this a good thing? I am sitting here blogging feeling so exhausted - a little bit of regretting why I fit so much stuff in my schedule - talking about being a power woman ! gee!!! Salute to those working mums! That said, I winged when I'm bored, and now I winged when I'm too busy too. Nico's never satisfied! Anyhow, I should be glad that things happen as it is now, I think...

Valentines - There are people whose life evolve just around themselves and their partner. I wonder how they managed to do that. Don't they get bored? I guess not - duh. That makes me ponder...what does my life evolve around? ... At the moment, everything feels such a stranger to me ... I wonder why. Some of my colleagues have just started to think of what to get for their GFs, shouldn't they do it earlier? Hmm. Some are making roses origami - so sweet - I'd prefer its made of money though :P. So, have you got something already for your valentine?

Chinese New Year - I don't really like CNY when I'm back home - maybe because I don't fancy the questions relatives bombard me with and the gossips they make - so much family politics. Now that I'm away, I actually miss having a nice scrumptious CNY dinner with my family - note just my immediate family :). Anyway, life is how it is - so unbelievable I am telling myself this! And I used to buy a lot of new stuff for CNY - family tradition, but I couldn't really be bothered this year as I don't have that much time to shop! Argh...I wanna go shopping!

Ok enough of ranting, I will wish you fellow Nicocism readers a proper CNY and Valentines in 3 days time. For now, ciao! - back to the serious matters I have to do!

01022010

Date: 01 02 2010 - the day and month mirrored the year!!!

It's Feb!!! And what a Monday! Got to work to find a production issue waiting for me to work on and spent literally whole day on it. Suddenly it felt like work has assimilated into my life - not a good thing? Hmm.

Thinking of my travel plans makes me happy bunny again I guess. :).

People say you work to live. At the moment, I work to travel...and to fulfil my shopping habits, and of course to realize my photography dreams.

Daily horoscope says: Continue to work diligently for now. You will soon be able to reap the fruits of your labor.

Next 2 days' horoscope says: Success comes to those who are willing to wait for it.

I shall be positive! I will be patient and 'wait'...

Where Home Is

Serving my last 24 hours of On-Call support, I've been obediently staying at home the whole day even though it is a Saturday. Mum said it's an auspicious day to clean the house before Chinese New Year. And so I did, well my room at least.

Upgraded my gym membership from Flexi-fit to Pay Monthly. This is just to motivate myself to work out more since I've been eating a lot since the Dec holidays. Hate Winter! I just can't stop eating! I blame it on SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). Believe me, I really had that for the first couple of weeks since I got back from KL!

The whole week has been a quiet one outside work. At work, a couple of production issues kept me busy for the first part of the week. And then it died down. Friday was pub lunch at the Red Lion for a colleague's leaving due. I'd say they do pretty good Sausage and Mash with red wine and onion sauce! Calories overloaded I know, but just can't resist! And the leaving due continued to drinks at the World's End, Camden after work. This colleague of mine is going back to Italy to help out his family business. I have to say he's a really great colleague to work with, such a nice friendly and grateful guy! I am lost of words to describe him but all I can say is that I'd learn that people will appreciate you more if you appreciate them as they are.

Right, coming back to the main topic...Where Home Is...

On the bus home from the pub, things keep floating around my mind...

I've come six thousand miles from home to live in somewhere so foreign. This September mark the 9th year I've been living in England. Along the way, I meet people, coming to this city full of hope and aspiration. To me, suddenly London's became just like an airport. It's a city with people flocking in for opportunities. But as time goes by, these people leave, back to where they 'belong'. Of course, some stay because they made here home. The question I ask myself - do I belong here...

During lunch, this Italian colleague of mine asked me if I am planning to go 'home' or stay. I know this is a very common question I get every now and then. But coming from him, I wonder, now that he's decided to go 'home', he has the right to ask because he's made a decision. And the fact that everyone else who asked the same question already know what they want and thus has the 'right' to ask? You must be wondering why am I so bothered? Well, that's cause I'm frustrated that I don't know the answer. Some said I think too much and that I'm worried for no reason and that I should just go with the flow. Is that true? I shouldn't be worried? Hmm. I really want to think that I'm thinking too much...full stop

...ok maybe not yet...and then life goes on.

Maze

Lunch at Maze:

We had the 4 course tasting menu each. There were 9 to choose from on the menu, and we literally ordered everything except for the oxtail. 5 savoury and 3 sweets.

Menu as per Maze website :

Savoury

• Onion squash soup, puffed wild rice, ewe’s curd, smoked bacon, braised chicken thighs,chestnut powder
• Marinated beetroot, Slipcote cheese, pine nuts and Cabernet Sauvignon dressing
• Cornish red mullet, tapenade, croutons, aioli, fish soup
• ‘Scotch broth’ roasted halibut, black pudding,Argyle ham, turnip purée
• Citrus spiced oxtail, wild turnips, horseradish and sour apple risotto
• Braised shoulder of aged lamb, faggot, parsnip purée, pear jam, ox-eye daisy, cob-nuts

Sweet

• Devon milk and yoghurt mousse, winter berry sorbet, dried winter fruits and oats,berry syrup
• Winter clémentine mess, powdered brazil nuts, clémentine sorbet, vanilla oil
• Devonshire rice pudding, spiced blackberry jam, clotted cream and blackberry ripple ice cream

The best dish of all would be the lamb - it was heavenly - meat cooked to perfection (as they always say on reality cooking shows :P) - very tender and moist...lol. Beetroot and slipcote cheese is quite an interesting combination of sweet and salty - nice. Soup is nice as well. Both fish were decent, but preferred the halibut and black pudding over the mullet.

All in all it was quite a nice meal. They even gave us some sweet treats after paying - chocolate with some crispy raspberry filling, ginger and vanilla fudge. Plus, the table next to us doesn't have it! Sweet!

That said, I think I still prefer Petrus. But that was a couple of years back, maybe I have higher expectations now? lol...But then again, the Petrus meal was double the price, so can't really compare I guess. And also, as a lil' fan of Jason Atherton, I think I should also put in a little bit of biased comments - Maze is really good! :P

Total damage done: 40 quid (plus wine though)

Ilaichi & Choc Apple Devils

Went to Ilaichi - the new international buffet place at the Galleria for team lunch today. £7.50 for all you can eat is reasonable enough. Food wise, it's not as international as it seems. There are pizzas, pastas, mexican tacos, ratatouille, a lot of indian curries, some sweet sour and stir fried noodles and a decent salad bar. It is no doubt a little more variety than just having a normal Chinese buffet across the road, but still the food is very take awayey style.

Brought the chocolate and apple devils to colleague's house warming party...went with 35, 9 came back...and got some pretty good compliments, or maybe they are just being nice. Anyhow, I think I should level up my baking adventure :))

2010 Baking Kicks Off

Sometime last year in the autumn, I came across the book 'The Worry-Free Bakery' by Kumiko Ibaraki from Japan Centre. I thought I found the most brilliant book in the planet! Why, because it's a baking recipes does not use any oil or butter at all. Absolute genius, a girl's best friend it is!

I was meant to try out some of the recipes, but was caught up with busy schedules at work and holiday plans. Now that I am almost snowed in, I gave the recipes a try - start out with some simple ones - apple muffins - made it my way - they now look like lil' cupcakes to me :). Also tried the chocolate banana muffin, except there ain't banana in it, but apples as well. I really think the recipes are brilliant! So who say we need butter or oil in cakes? :)

突然見... 覺得很累...

Things to Remind myself

Things to remind myself as I battle through my 2010 resolutions...

...Be Patient...

...Remain Positive...

...Be Prepared To Be Flexible...

...Adapt if things don't work...

...Trust my instincts!...

...Keep faith in what I am doing!...

Any kind of support very much needed!

勇敢

原來...人大了, 就需要懂得勇敢面對一切一切...

When it snows...

I thought I've completely missed the snow this winter. I was wrong. It started snowing yesterday. And the snow remained today as the temperature fell to all time low - the coldest night of the year tonight? Hmm. As usual, when it snows, everything comes to a stand still in UK.

Putting on my "UGG Boots", I managed to drag myself to work and all the way to Asda to shop for food later in the evening - I've just came back on Sunday and have been surviving on take aways the first two days. Such a bad day to do grocery shopping. As I had expected, there were not that many buses. I called for a taxi, but it didn't turn up. After about 15 minutes waiting, some other taxis pull up in front of Asda trying to get some customers. Almost all taxi companies hiked up their prices that day. One of the drivers asked me if I want a taxi (obviously I did) but there weren't that many people on the streets - and they still want to hike up the price? hmm look who's in charge here! And so I tried to haggle managed to get a flat price of a fiver instead of something ridiculous if it's by meter - like 7 - 8 quid.

At work, there are people having difficulty getting to work and likewise some others had to leave early and work from home in case they get stuck in the office. Wasn't a productive day indeed. Anyhow, I don't have the excuse to slack since I live so near to the office! It's just the walk that is unpleasant. But I think I should be fine with my snow boots :). Hopefully the weather gets warmer again soon and melt all the iced snow away!...

2010

It's already 2010! Why don't I feel any different, I wonder...hmm.

First day at work as well. After a tiring 12 hours running around Rome - I blame it on the 10 hours flight from KL and most of it was down to not feeling well (women's problem that is :P) I was still half zombified at work but managed to go through the 5oo odd emails in which almost 70% are irrelevant and got some work done! I already felt a tinge of regret before boarding the flight - wondered why I squeezed the 12 hours transit time in my flight. Anyhow, I survived (although I didn't quite enjoy much of Rome due to the exhaustion and the freezing weather)!!!

Recap of 2009:

It had been a year of ups and downs - every year was - but 2009 had its fair share. Life had been revolved around work and travel - bilbao, iceland, kent, bristol, new york, denmark, sweden, cambodia, hong kong, rome and of course, KL - wow, didn't imagine I'd achieved so much! Also met up with a lot of friends who I haven't met for ages - had a great time catching up with each other's lives - and thanks for technology (facebook etc) that brought us back together! I'd also moved teams at work - which kept me challenged for a bit more. The economy hadn't been easy in general and although it didn't affect me dramatically, some things had to be delayed. And come to think of it, it is time to resume execution in this year! I've also realised that in 2009 alone, I blogged more frequently than ever and hopefully I will continue to do so. 2009 ended with my long awaited 3 whole weeks holiday. This long vacation was a really good break. It was tiring. I fitted a lot into this 3 weeks, it was suffocating (well some of it) but a very fulfilling one. I spent quality time with family and friends. It made me think more of what I should be heading for.

In 2009, I learnt the art of endurance and hope it will stay with me and leave all sorrows behind.

I hereby declare 2010 starts at this very moment!

Firstly, I like to wish all my friends and everyone that is dear to me a great and smooth sailing new year ahead. May this year be your year! Thank you for all your love and support and of course for tolerating the demanding Nico - love you lot dearly. To those I think I hate, sorry you annoyed me but I love you as much and may you have a wonderful year as well.

Nico's 2010 blue-sky resolutions:

Direction. direction, direction

Be more motivated and determined!

Work Harder (i.e. don't be lazy cleaning up my room ><)

Be more honest to myself!

Start investing

Time to settle down? (mum and dad's getting worried :P)

Wish me luck!

My new motto of life for 2010: Be Brave! The sky is a big quilt at the end of the day!